Cookin', home schooling and other fun things!

     Goodness, it is high speed all the time here.  I am not opposed to high speed, but sure like to shift into slow every now and again.  Last week was one thing after another and none of them could be ignored.  A dog situation that left me rather frazzled, struggling with Children's to get confirmation on our surgery date for Miss France and well just a lot of other things that would bore you to tears and yet have me in a dither.

     This week began ELO for us and that is always an event to behold.  Why?  Because the kids love it.  I feel like I have a billion kids that I have to get school supplies for and make sure they have done their work and my own class to get ready for.  It makes me run away from my computer.  As it turns out, I did forget the supplies for one child altogether. Ooops!  Yes, I am THAT mother.  Next week... there is always next week.

Fun vow renewal with the Bells and their newly adopted 3 girls!  Beautiful!

     This week was also the 2nd "cook" done with only 2 of us.  Let's observe a moment of silence for the "cook".....actually I say we shout praises to our precious SAVIOR for me learning about this glorious invention by some really creative time challenged mom.  As many of you have read, I have done freezer cooking for over 4 years and it has changed my life.  In fact I am not sure if I could ever go back to cooking like normal!  I don't have time or energy or the patience.  The great thing is the flexibility to cook whatever YOUR family likes.  Gluten free, no problem, "clean" cooking...great, corn free, whatever.  With our group of 4, we cooked 6 recipes 4 times.  This means we took home 24 different meals of yummy goodness.  Our servings are for 8 and the costs had gotten a little pricey at about $10 or more a meal (still cheaper than eating out) which means a bit over $1 each before veggies/salad, etc.  Our goal is less than $1 per person.

   This spring my group took a break, but I was NOT going to give this up so I marched forward and found a new partner.  She, also had done freezer cooking so this was nothing new to her.  We did the same thing.  6 meals done 4 times, BUT we had only 12 different meals because all of our meals were doubled.  There is NO point in ever making ANY food without doubling it OR MORE!  Why mess up the kitchen for less than that????  If I am going to make a mess I am going to get more out of it....like a freezer meal or 4!  This time we actually got 27 meals out of it.  One we planned and doubled and the other was by accident with leftover stuff.  When life gives you extra food, make a meal and FREEZE IT!  My cookin'  partner made her meals pretty much before we got to together....overachiever.....I made all but 2.  We finished together and went to lunch...a rarity.  With the exception of Chic fila I think the last time I went to lunch was with her when we cooked last.  I don't get out much, people!  Now here is the amazing part....cost. Wait for it, wait for it.....$7 a meal!  YES!  Less than $1 a person! How?  I have no idea!!!  Well, kind of no idea.....we really used what we had in the pantry, chose less expensive items for our recipes, and have a cow in our freezers.  Yep, that cow is a glorious thing.  He just sits there until we need something and then coughs up ground beef!  Ha!  No, we bought a cow and split it with people to have slaughtered.  We didn't go and name him and feed him....we just paid for it and boy am I thrilled!  The meat is grass fed (no corn) and delicious without any extra junk in it and it was cheaper than we could ever get in the store! And the angels sang....  I am so excited. SO, what are we having for dinner?  Well, not one of the freezer meals.  I actually thawed round steak for fajitas and that is NOT what you use for fajitas so we are having chicken fried steak.

The mess that is chicken fried steak.....the yumminess being cooked.

Some finished!


 That is serious deliciousness, but it feels like hours in a hot kitchen making a mess worthy of moving instead of cleaning....and to top it off, my kitchen is spotless.  Bummer!  On top of that I made Chocolate Granola Bars with my little helpers. Talk about needing to double!  I didn't have enough ingredients to do that so I just used the recipe like normal....by the time I licked the bowl.....uhem...I mean tasted it to make sure all of the ingredients were good, there was hardly any left.  Instead of putting them in a pan, I put them in mini cupcakes and froze them.  Oh my....let's just pretend we didn't make them.  I will hide the evidence and my little helpers and I will take care of the evidence before anyone knows! 

Oh my...these are good. That is all this recipe made....so not fair!

Back to the kitchen for the chicken fried steak.  I hope I have it made before next week.

Helping a child adjust into your home...

Being a foster parent has changed our lives in more ways than we ever expected.  Here are just a FEW ways. 

1.  We are no longer secluded in our safe little world.  We are IN the world because of dealing with CPS, other agencies who work with "our" children, as well as their families (ex. WIC, MEDICAID).  
      This is NOT a bad thing.  This is Kingdom work.
2. Our world changes on a dime with each new placement.  None of it is predictable. Life seldom is.
3. We must be flexible in our schedule minute to minute.
4.  Our family does not look like other families. That is okay!

     With a new placement comes new territory.  We have NO idea the baggage this child will carry. DO NOT EVER UNDERESTIMATE THE BAGGAGE A NEWBORN CAN CARRY...if 9 months in the womb were rough, they come out in the fight, flight or freeze mode and their brain is in overdrive or under- drive.  This was a HARD lesson learned for us.We are now going to be the ones to gently unpack that baggage.  Over-stimulation is underestimated DAILY.  This is a hard one for me because of the number of children we have as well as the number of activities.  Thinking that these kids need to get into our grove is way under-estimating what their brains can take in.  It can be damaging.  I am guilty of this.

     These kids need to bond with you!!!  Don't listen to those who say otherwise.  To bond is to be capable of bonding.  If you push them away because you are afraid of that, you have damaged them in a great way.  They must be able to bond even if the caretaker has to change.  The less moves the better, but in orphan care this is unfortunately something that changes more often than it should.  This sometimes can not be helped.  In needing to bond with you, they do not need to be put up for "show and tell" right away.  This is a really hard one for me because I want to show them off and love on them and have other people love on them because more than likely this is something they haven't had.  Unfortunately, this is not helpful at first and certainly not in big doses.  They need to know who to depend on and who to trust and this is not something that is easy for them.  Having people in and out of your house is too much.  The nursery at church or Sunday School without you may be too much at first.  Some of this can't be helped; school or daycare for example.  Be aware that the repercussions of this will be there and you need to be prepared to love them through it.  Slowly introduce them to new people and new things (at least as slowly as you can).  Please know, that this post is for me as much an anyone else.  I know what is best for them, but making it happen is often hard.

     Food is almost always a big deal (it certainly has been with almost all of our foster children). They need to see that it comes from you.  They need to see you prepare it and serve it.  They need to see you provide it.  If people bring you meals, make sure they understand that you are the one who will always provide food for them.  Eating out may not be the best option at first.  More than likely, their diet was NOT good (If this is a foreign adoption, be aware of how different their foods are than ours.  They will need to adjust very slowly).  This does not mean you can change it suddenly.  Adjust them in to a good balance of food.  (Thank you AA for reminding me of these things.  It fit this post that was already partially written).  As Americans we have the best of all foods and yet we daily abuse that and eat the worst stuff!  Stop it!

     Routine is essential.  Bedtime crucial as well as regularly scheduled meals.  Sleep is something we don't get enough of.  We think we are fine.  We are NOT!

3-6 Years Old: 10 - 12 hours per day.  Most are getting the same amount as the adults!
7-12 Years Old: 10 - 11 hours per day  Think about how to achieve this!  If you get up at 7 they must be in bed by 8.  Really! If you are having ANY kinds of problems with any child....refer to this time schedule.  Make a change for at least 10 days and then address the issues.  Their little brains cannot possibly handle life without enough sleep!  Getting extra sleep one night does NOT make up a sleep debt that has not been paid in a long time!  Read up on this!  I am NOT kidding!

     We try to stick to a routine at our house.  We are up around 7 and sometimes earlier.  School begins as soon as everyone is somewhat (we home school so "somewhat is close enough") dressed and fed.  This can take awhile with the little girls.  School for them is 2 days a week and begins at 8:30 so school at home begins for us around 9:15.  One day is spent at ELO (Extended Learning Opportunities) which is "school" for home schoolers.  The two days the girls are home has school starting earlier and intense work done during the girls 2 naps, one at 10 and the other at 2.  During the time they are awake, we try to give them something to do like coloring or puzzles or a beloved Dora episode.  Sometimes this goes well, and sometimes it doesn't.  We are learning what works and what doesn't and how to change it as they get older.  Lunch is at 12 and lasts around 45 minutes.  Once they eat, they often go outside and run around for a while, especially in good weather.  If they weather is really good, we do school outside, either on the front porch or at the pool.  Yes, it can be distracting, but for the most part we get school done quickly because we are motivated to play and work in the garden or climb trees!

     Now, this remains the same with additional ones only we have to work them into this routine.  This takes time to ease them in.  A new born sleeps more and for shorter times.  I have found that even a 5 to 6 month will work into this same routine if we keep it going every day.  They will usually have an additional nap in there as well as go to bed earlier than the 7:30 to 8 bedtime.  We do devotionals without them because they are later.  All children thrive on routine (they won't tell you this), but for a new one in your home, you must ease them in.  They have not been on YOUR schedule and more than likely they weren't on ANY schedule.  Be patient and loving.  Take as long as they need, but be CONSISTENT!  Ugh, that is a HARD word!

     As far as shopping.  Seldom do I ever shop with younger children.  It is done at night or my husband does it (and the angels sang).  It disrupts our day too much and it too overstimulating for our younger ones.  Besides, I HATE to shop.

     Chores.  Oh boy, that is such a dirty word at our house.  We take breaks and set timers to get chores done.  I will have a complete post on chores at some point.  This is always changing.  I don't know why!  I wish I did.  Right now we have a system that seems to be working well if we truly work it....except when it doesn't.  Most of the time it is ME not working it with them!  Today is a good day so I won't complain!

Read to them....all of them.  Rock them (if they will let you).  Hug them (build up to this if they are not comfortable...read their body language).  Sing to them!  Yes, even if you don't think you can sing well.  It's a bonding thing.  Diffuse lavendar in their room!  This has BEEN a BIG thing at our house and WOW does it work!  We use Doterra Essential Oils (that is another post as well)! Pray with them and for them!  They need to hear you and see you praying for them! Laugh and laugh often!  Laughter is one size fits all and is just plain good for you!

Spring Break and Home schooling

Home school Spring Break comes by surprise!  It sneaks in while we are playing catch up and actually DO catch up.  This year has had some bumps along the way.  Moving....I thought we would take only a brief time off.  Not true.  We would do school and yet not do school.  We lost our rhythm and our routine and that tends to make things challenging.  For our little girls this is also crucial.  Since then we have had to re-evaluate and re-map things.  Since the new year we are better at handling the ups and downs of daily life as a foster family.  We now know where our books are and how to handle schedule changes.

 Bible Study with Picture This has been just down right FUN!  The kids love it and we find that we do more than we plan on! I think it may be called something else now.

We also are enjoying Mystery of  History. We are not good at getting our timeline done and I am beginning to wonder if we should have bought the figures that go along with it, but we love the History and how simply it is put!  This has been an unexpected look at how simplicity and this note taking approach really does serve well for memory!  We add additional work where needed or wanted and have fun along the way.


Horizons Math as always worked well for the younger ones and Saxon for 6th and up and continues to work well!
Newsflash.  We are switching to Teaching Textbooks.  We have done it before, but I had problems with the discs.  Customer Service ROCKS my world.  They are THE BOMB!!!  Because they work the missed problems for them....well, needless to say, even though I LOVE math, this makes my life easier!

English...Grammar....always proves to be a challenge for me.  I just never completely get happy with what we do.  I don't want to "teach to the test" and yet since I started teaching the SAT Prep class (which I LOVE) in our Co op classes, I have to wonder if that wouldn't work.  Writing is essential and that has never been a doubt in my mind.  Thank you Home2Teach (online) and IEW for helping me with writing.  Grammar....oh boy!  Easy Grammar...Rod and Staff...I do it all and that can sometimes be too much.  I also use Easy Grammar.  Pathways is a staple for reading comprehension. Wordly Wise (this is proven for the kids taking the SATs), and Word Roots are for vocabulary and because both are shorter it takes the 2 to complete a year.  Spelling is just...interesting.  I use Spelling Power sporadically and then add words they miss from other lessons.  Both of my kids that are home schooled, as well as the one who was home schooled are pretty good at spelling so I just don't push it.

Science is wonderful as always!  Apologia is spectacular and having it in Co op Classes helps to reinforce it.  Colin would breathe Science if we let him.  He reads so many Science books all the time!  Caroline enjoys it as well.  Apologia makes it fun and interesting!

I know I have left something out, but will have to return when it is not so late.  Next week, I will have to do some grading and planning for the rest of the year, but I think we are on target.  We are behind a little bit with personal reading and also on our read alouds, but we have spent lots of time with history and bible so that is not a loss!

Happy Spring Break!  I get to see my friend this week and her new (not new to her now) foster children as well as her great bio girls!  Excited to see her!

Ooh, I didn't mention Critical Thinking.  We do LOTS of it, but it is not always daily.  I will post those later!  ANYTHING and EVERYTHING from Critical Thinking is AWESOME.  You cannot go wrong with them! They are so crucial for SAT and ACT prep. They help our kids think thoroughly and outside the box.  I just got my catalog so I am logging out!

Could I take you to lunch for your birthday?

     A friend called to invite me to lunch for my birthday.  I wistfully smiled and declined, not because I didn't want to, but just the sheer task of preparing to GO to lunch was not worth the lunch. It has nothing to do with her.  I would LOVE to spend time with her.  Not saying I don't do these things occasionally, but it takes a major amount of work to make it happen.  Everything has to go smoothly or at least close to smoothly (this does not mean I expect my children to be perfect, but if something gets off then the day goes down hill or we have to re-vamp another area).  Never mind that any foster child must be with me or an approved babysitter....bahaha.  The others could stay at home due to their ages, but I don't like to do that if at all possible.

    Now you get to take a glimpse at a typical day in our home and why I said, "no".  Wake up time is about 7:30 for the crew that remains home.  This means my oldest and my husband have already gotten up and left the house for school and work.  At that time I know I must go wake the sleeping girls.  I am WAY beyond blessed that they do NOT wake me up, but it is still hard to not leave them sleeping.....been there, done that, not a good idea for the rest of the day.  Hopefully, but not always, my daughter and son have gotten up and are standing there ready to help....bahaha.  Okay, I better back up.  That was my fantasy morning.  In the REAL world I go to wake each of the older ones up.  Usually my younger son is up and looking half dazed.  Dragging my pre teen daughter out of bed,  is another story.  It takes effort and usually a few threats of bodily harm or taking away "screens" for at least.....ever or keeping her from seeing her friends.  These tactics usually work and if they don't, there is always a cup of ice water.

     Now to wake the little girls.  One wakes up like sunshine.  The other....NOT so much.  I never know which is best to wake up first.  Many times their diapers are so full, because we forgot to keep drinks away from them after dinner, that I must bathe them.  There is just something about a full "teetee" diaper that makes a child smell REALLY bad.  This is a quick bath, which is not met with joy from little girls who could stay in the tub all day.  In and out and now there is screaming.  Sunshine girl gets over it quicker and is dressed fairly easily.  "Wakes up on the wrong side of the crib" is screaming like she has been stabbed with a pencil and trying to wriggle out of my arms.  This makes the dressing process difficult.  Does this count as a work out?  I need to think of an exotic name like "Zumba" and make videos.  I could make millions!  Doesn't seem to work out in the weight loss department, but I don't have to SHARE that part, do I?  Hum.....

     Now, the outfit choice is crucial here.  I have it all out and right at the changing table.  If I'm quick and the stars line up right, "wakes up on the wrong side of the bed" won't notice due to the throes of her fit, and I can slip it on before she notices.  This is also my fantasy.  She WILL notice and she will begin to scream for another outfit and more than likely it will be for the "cookie" shirt.  This is her favorite.  Before you tell me to just let her wear it or go and buy 3 like it, I will tell you that clothes on a toddler MUST be washed at some point, sometimes with lots of products and stain removers.  You also must consider what YOU might be saying if you saw me for  7 consecutive days and saw said child in the SAME shirt.  Would you remember my post and smile sympathetically or would you call a few friends and throw me under the bus with the other moms who let their children get away with EVERYTHING.  Nuff said.  We are NOT wearing the cookie shirt today.

     Okay, supposing we survived the dressing process, we are now heading to breakfast.  I know, I know, am I crazy?  Why did I bathe and dress them BEFORE breakfast?  Okay, I'll tell you.  We bathe and dress several times so what difference does it make really?  My REAL reason is that if we eat breakfast first we seem to loose momentum for the "dressing process".  I don't know why.

     Girls are headed to breakfast and NOW I am bathing the "Tank".  He has to take one separate since he doesn't sit up well and isn't cool with the splashing.  In and out, new diaper and clothes on a wiggly VERY fat, adorable baby.  22lbs at just turned 8 months is BIG.  MY back will tell you!!!  In fact your back will tell you if you hold him for any length of time.  He goes in the bouncer with a bottle and the girls get in their highchairs.  I have considered using duct tape in this process since they always try to get out, but I feel certain CPS would not approve even though they are adopted.  So for now, my cute pink duct tape remains in the drawer unused.

     Breakfast: It would be best to only allow dry foods that don't make a mess, but truly only an IV can offer you that and we're not into needles.  Biscuits and homemade jam are an option and not a good one.  Amazing day, look, both bibs are perfectly clean.  I realize this means less laundry for me and makes me smile before I realize that a clean bib means the jam went somewhere else.  Had to!  Yep.  It has oozed down the side of the child wearing the solid colored pants (if they were patterned I could have smeared it in and not really noticed it).  It then proceeded to ooze under her little rump that is continually trying to get out of seat belt. Now is all over that little rump!  The other darling daughter, the one will the newly done braids that took almost 2 hours, has managed to add jam to her hair.  It needs moisturizer, doesn't it mommy?

     Breakfast is done.  The next 2 hours are spend, sweeping, mopping and cleaning an 8 ft radius of the high chairs and all the crack and crevices of the chairs.  Fantasy....I DO NOT have 2 hours and what's a little jam on the floor.  We have a dog.

     School has begun with the older ones and again, I am blessed.  My kids are fairly independent with their work.  For those who have known me for a long time, this is one of the 7 Wonders of the World and nothing short of a miracle.  I settle the little girls with some great PRE pre-school activities to aid learning and raise their IQ.  Bahaha.  I am in survival mode.  I give them blocks, or colors or puzzles and we hope for the best.  "Tank", otherwise known as DJ is army crawling everywhere.  Of course, he won't go for toys I have scattered down for him to enhance learning, once again (this is sarcasm in case you didn't get it) he is either heading for the cord tucked underneath the table or the fireplace with sharp edges.  I have to be quick, he certainly is.  I go back and forth between the electrical danger, chin splitting option, block throwing, coloring ON the puzzles, yes, that is a pronoun and no that is not a multiplication problem and no you cannot skip your writing assignment because you had a splinter in your writing finger last month.

     The countdown is on.  10:00 is coming.  Naptime is NOT an option at our house.  It is NOT just for children, it is for mommy.  Sing a song and go night night.  Diapers changed, go potty, and go down.  Get the right "icky".  Not the pink one, the brown one! Blankets, AKA as ickies or is that Icky's, who knows, are a BIG deal to the child with the wardrobe malfunctions.  Oh, that was something entirely different.  How about the wardrobe pickiness.  We'll go with that word, even though it's NOT a word.

     Do I need to go any further?  Do you even know where this post started and what the question was?  Are you still reading?  Not likely.

     No, I can't go to lunch.  It's only 10:20 and I haven't showered or dressed.  The only thing I've done is eat and brush my teeth and even that is not certain.  Lunch.  I can't think that far ahead.  This is the time we do the BIG school things that take intense instruction.  We have 2 hours and that is not enough time.  Sometimes we go ahead and do Bible and History or sometimes we wait until the afternnoon.  It depends on what we are working on and how much time it is going to take.  This is a daily decision and changes.

   Lunch?....it's 4 o"clock now.  Where did the day go?  What did I have for lunch?  Oh look there is part of a biscuit in the high chair.  That'll do.

I'm linking to http://noordinarybloghop.blogspot.com/2012/01/family-parenting-and-marriage-2012.html

Check out See Jamie Blog

Check out See Jamie Blog.  I have a button for her site on my blog...the button for Adoption Stories is part of her blog and the spot you need to see.  I have never met Jamie in person, but have enjoyed her blog for a long time.  Our story of adoption is on her site along with many other great "reads".  Check it out!

Scheduling and other holy things...

     Scheduling is such a difficult venture.  We have to schedule appointments, we have to schedule "school", activities, therapies and so on.  I am by nature a little mix of "free spirit" and schedule hound (sounds like a multiple personality diagnosis, I know).  I want to be more free flowing and go with the flow and yet life demands more schedule than that and honestly my children NEED more than that.  In order to make things work we have to follow some sort of routine in this house.

     We are not legalistic by any means AND this sort of a schedule does NOT work for everyone, BUT for us it does and one thing I can say without a doubt:  It works for young children (babies, if you will) and big children (that could be me I am referring to...or of course my older children who are out of diapers).  I can say this with confidence after having 5 foster babies under 2 in one year.  EVERY ONE of them has slept well in both naps and nighttime once they got on a routine unless REFLUX was involved. Babies go to sleep from 10:00 am to 12 pm and 2 pm to 4 pm (these can vary by 30 minutes or so, but THEY happen or we suffer the consequences).  Life is smooth  with these naps.  They typically get up at 7:30 ish....this varies and go to bed around 7:30ish to 8:30 ish.  This has been for ALL 5 babies (6 now as of 11/2011) and has worked well (the ages have ranged from 1 month to17 months).  It may take a week or longer to get into the routine or if they are younger and take more naps then you work yours into this as they get older, but by 6 months they are on this schedule with maybe a shorter nap in there sometimes.  This is wonderful for us and helps us to work around school accordingly.

    School before that first nap time is pretty much on their own without too much help from me or sporadic help from me.  Before 10 the little ones eat, play in their highchairs and on the floor with various toys I put out to keep them playing.  These toys vary to hold their interest.  Sometimes it works and sometimes they wander around to the ball pit.  At 10 we HIT the hard academic work. I sometimes allow each child to choose which subject (there is the "free spirit") and sometimes I have to dictate the subject due to the content that needs work or because they are ignoring a subject a little too much.  We sometimes do our reading together during this time or sometimes we wait until the afternoon nap depending on the amount of reading we anticipate.  We read at least 2 books at a time and do our Bible study which can be time consuming because of the coloring that goes along with it.  We use "Picture This" and it is fantastic at getting all ages to really "see" the Bible come alive.  We LOVE to read together and could just sit all day and read sometimes!  We use Sonlight as our reading list.  Right now we are doing American History and are studying the Oregon Trail with some books borrowed from a friend.

     Time can get away from us and life can happen and will happen no matter what.  If we don't have a plan then we fall apart.  It's not just "school"...that is not the only lesson here, diligence and persistence and meeting goals.  There are so many goals here, so many life lessons.  Fortunately, I feel like even the days when "life happens" we are learning other things.  God provides lessons in life and for that we are grateful.  Some lessons are helping with sick siblings or helping with therapy with Miss France.  Sometimes we do just read. Legalism could really wreck our personal world, but a schedule does help us to stay focused and continue along a path toward our goals.  Currently, we are NOT doing school today (this post was started a while ago...today is REALLY Feb.3).  We just got home last night from Dallas where we were iced in after having Miss France's surgery postponed.  There were many lessons to be had while we were gone, but none of them were in our curriculum.  More on this later.

     Today we are nursing a few recovering children, it's my birthday and we have chosen to be lazy!  Oh boy....now I might be kicked out of the home school club!  I admitted that we are skipping school without a holiday on the calendar.   In my opinion that is the joy and freedom of homeschooling.  One child is actually ahead in MOST subjects and the other one easily catches up when needed.  We will read and do our Bible study in a little while.  So there, bible and history!  One child is actually...gasp....at a rehearsal  for Little Women at the Children's Theatre.  They realized that 3 out of the 4 sisters are home schooled and one is out of college and looking for a job.  I am in my robe....blasphemy, I know.  I am now headed to the shower and to grab our books.  I might even eat some chocolate....does that count as bonbons?  Ah, the life of luxury.  Now, I am laughing out loud for real!  Happy COLD Thursday (regardless of the date this post tells you).

Post form Raisingolives....

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This is from a great blog!  Sounds like a great book and what home school mom doesn't like a good read!
Check it out and check out her blog!  


Enter to win your own copy of Large Family Logistics.

Yes, you read that right. Raising Olives is giving away not one, but TWO copies of Large Family Logistics. Earlier this week I gushed (and a lot of you gushed) about how much this book has helped our home.  Moving chore time to the afternoon is just the tip of the iceberg, there are many great ideas and practical tips. I am truly grateful for the opportunity to share this resource with you.
Large Family Logistics isn’t just for large families. It would be helpful for any mother who is running a home.  (I think it would make a wonderful wedding or baby shower gift). Kim has chocked this book full of practical tips from meal planning and quiet time to stain removal and ideas for successful breastfeeding and chore training.
But LFL isn’t just a practical, how-to book for managing a home. It also hits the heart of the matter.

Motherhood is a life of sacrifice; it is a life poured out for our children. So what are we to do to get some space from it all? When we are honest with ourselves, we know that it is not “Me Time” we need or a “Girls’ Night Out”. Children are not a burden to escape or endure; they are a blessing that drives us to Christ because we are incapable of parenting well without Him. God is who we need. While there are helpful strategies we can employ in order to have a more peaceful day with our children, the number one thing we must do is to deny Self and cling to the cross. ~Kim Brenneman, Large Family Logistics

Recovery and life in general

     Recovery is such a funny thing. We WANT to take it easy and then we don't. We want to go slow and then we don't. Oops, am I using the word WE? I guess I should change that to ME. I am enjoying the pace and yet I seem to see the world racing past me and I wonder if I'll get behind. What is "get behind" anyway? Does this mean my kids might miss a math lesson, or..yikes...we don't follow the exact schedule I laid out at the beginning of the year? Did I accidentally encourage a friend on the phone when it wasn't on my google calendar? Isn't life, real life, what accidentally happens on the way....to, well....something? Does the entire math book have to be done? Does it have to be done in exact order? I ask these questions because they roll around in my head all the time. I was a school teacher with lesson plans THAT HAD to be turned in mind you. Hand to be executed according to the almighty TAKS or TAS or AT&T or CBS or something like that. What lessons are missed that happen in the unexpected? Those are the BIG ones, not my perfect little lesson plans with my perfect little soldiers....yeah, I dream about that one! LOL

     Now, don't misunderstand me, I am not taking "school" lightly. I just think I am guilty more times than not of being driven by a calendar or goals when the goal needs to be the child and the education of the child BUT NOT just the schedule of it all. I am often referring to the book Cultural Literacy and making notes and reminding myself of these things my children should be exposed to and yet once that book hits the shelf then much of it is forgotten. Discussion.....not on the lesson plan...those are important.

     As soon as I came home from the hospital child #3 asks me, "Exactly what kind of surgery did you have and what did they take out?" He also told a friend I couldn't lift anything for a while because I had stitches in my arms and they might rip out. I had to go back and explain a few things. He came to this conversation prepared (he's really into Science).  He had 2 of his science books with pictures and he was ready. It would have been easy to brush him off, I was on medication and I was tired, but his 7 year old mind was ready to understand so I did it. For once I did it! We got the "Girl" anatomy pictures out and then explained the girl parts and why mine needed to move on (I had a hysterectomy for those coming late into this discussion). Then the whole bladder thing was a little confusing. Stitches and why did that keep me from lifting. He got it, but it took a while. Now, I am hopeful and yet not confident that he will not go and share his new found information with his friends.

   Hysterectomy and Bladder Suspension surgery coming from a 7 year old male to other 7 year old children, is not ideal. Oh the phone calls I may get. We shoot pretty straight here at our house. Within maturity and intellectual levels considered we answer questions that are asked. Colin is a science guy and he "gets it" so we explain, yes with pictures! I am SO going to be in trouble. Colin has told us he plans on being a pediatrician a few days a week and then a babysitter on the other day so we were just getting him started early. We did share that a pediatrician was kind of like a babysitter so he is considering it full time. He has time to make his choice.
 

      Now back to recovery: I AM taking it easy. I can't drive and I don't lift which means that my children change all the diapers and put kids in high chairs. I have only packed 2 boxes of Christmas stuff, which means we have 2 somewhat naked trees standing in our house and piles of stuff everywhere. I hate piles.....ooops, bad word! I have cleared out baby closets trying to get to my goal of less is more like I wrote about a while ago. 9 outfits? Really? That won't happen, but I am going for less. 9 outfits with babies who can go through 2 a day means way more laundry than I can adequately do. How many cute sweaters is too many? Cleaned out! They will go into storage for other foster children. We are close to overflowing right now! We are giving more out, but we are also being blessed with more people giving us stuff! That has been the extent of my cleaning for 2 days. It is NOT much. Those clothes are laying in the corner of my bedroom daring a realtor to show our house or show our junk! If God plans on selling it he'll sell it with my piles.

Home Schooling and Curriculum

     So...curriculum. This is always a tough one. I envy those who are confident and sure about their choices. I love so many things and then DON'T like other things. It's hard to know what's best. Is there a best.....the REAL answer is NO.  I try to constantly follow the book Cultural Literacy. This book is amazing and what is shocking is how many of the things listed as NEED TO KNOW....I didn't know. Oops. I try to make sure that everything we do stays focused and that crucial facts are learned that are important to life. Yes, of course we do math, and sentence structure and we learn about cells and how many bones are in the body and who was the .....(you fill in the blank).

     Here are the books we use right now: Both Caroline (11 as of last week and in 5th grade) and Colin (7 1/2...he will NOT let me forget the 1/2 and technically in 2nd grade) use Horizons Math.

Both do Wordly Wise for vocabulary and then switch to Word Roots for the remainder of the year.

Both do Rod and Staff English....I am very mixed on how I feel about diagramming so we learn it and then skip a year of it and do Easy Grammar. This gives us a versatile look at grammar. RandS is very thorough...in fact TOO thorough if we did the entire book so I allow them do do shorter lessons at times depending on their knowledge and work ethic at the time. If the work ethic is not going well, then we do more work. Mean mom, I know.

Writing...Probably the most important thing to teach and the one thing I am totally uncomfortable with. I use Excellence in Writing, but not with confidence. We also do online classes with www.home2teach.com from time to time.  They are AMAZING!

Colin does Explode the Code....I don't remember the level. He goes pretty fast with this one and personally it seems a little easy to me, but reinforces handwriting and other skills so we keep it. He also enjoys it.

Both kids also do Pathways. We have done this one since the beginning. We tried to switch to Christian Light, but it just didn't work for us. This one works and my kids love the stories. Yes, they are old and Menonite and yet very engaging, not to mention challenging!

History is such a mix of many things. (as of 2012 we are doing Mystery of History and love it. We still read from Sonlight's booklist and get more of them on ebay).  Not confident always in my wandering since I love history so much, but we charge ahead all the same. We use Sonlight for history and reading! Best booklist ever! We read all the books and many of them together! I also add some additional ones in as they are appropriate....I know, I know, for those of you who know of Sonlight think I am crazy.... Sonlight is READING INTENSIVE and we are doing a 7th grade level. Oops. We are doing it over 2 years. No worries. We also do Picture This now known as www.picturesmartbible.com. It is quite creative and I have learned a lot in the process. The kids loe it....ALL ages from 15 on down. 

Science is Apologia for both kids and Colin is working through a Science book in addition to the reading from Apologia. We do NOT do it often enough. I am working on that.  

Spelling Power....I am very forgetful of this often. 

Piano by me. Violin for Colin and Caleb (Caleb is in his first year of Christian Heritage). Guitar not often with a video series. We just started Mavis Beacon for typing (haven't done it for a year or 2). Colin never wants to stop it. We also use Flashmaster for math drills when we need extra work in areas. Maybe one day I will truly learn all the things it does. It might even fold laundry! Whoohoo! I think that is it. I am tired and not sure. I purchased a homechooling planner this year really with the intent of coming up with my own for the future. It was hard for me to move away from the charts I made up during my first year of homeschooling and have used ever since, but I like it. I have noted some things I would change, but it is awesome! If I have time, I will publish make copies of my own along with my book on foster parenting....bahahaha....don't wait in line for it. Oh yeah, you read my blog, you won't. Just making sure I was still awake. I am, sort of.

Break my heart for what breaks yours... 2

How do I explain how and why we do what we do? I am just not that eloquent and can't seem to write straight from my heart. It comes out all jumbled. I understand why Moses said..."Not me....I can't speak", I can't speak or write and yet my heart cries out to be heard. How? I am NOT super woman. Those who really know me, know that. I am just an ordinary mom who was called by God to take on a task way bigger than myself. He fill the gaps, he lifts me up, he often carries me through.

When the call became clear it was more of a whisper that I was being selfish. Now, that was offensive. I didn't think I was selfish...I mean for crying out loud, I home school! Haha! How could that be selfish? I give above and beyond to my friends when they need me, I give of my financial resources, which aren't great, I assure you, but I do give. I pray for those who ask. I am NOT selfish! But God called again. This time he told he appreciated my time and my money,but HE wanted more. More? Seriously, I am tired enough already...what more can I give? He was silent for a while....years, actually. Then he quietly asked for my heart. This was perplexing because I thought I had given him my heart when I accepted him. What does that mean? It means I want you willing to be in pain for me, He whispered back, To need me more than anything to heal your heart.

And thus began our journey in foster parenting. We had to take "I" out of the equation. "I" can't give them back....to which he replies, "your children are only on loan". Ask any mother who has lost a child and she will tell you she wouldn't trade a moment with that child even though the pain of the loss never goes away...if it was only for a moment, a few years or many years. These children are only on loan. My heart DOES ache, but God is so much bigger than me and my pain. We don't go places like we used to....not everyone is ready for our larger family. Our 20th anniversary is this year and we had big plans, but those are now a distant plan. There is no place for our babies to go and our plans are just not as big as our GOD who wants us right where we are....in a rocking chair and at the highchair or right in our own front yard. We are okay with that! We feel his warm arms, we feel his breath on our skin as he encourages us and often carries us. It is SO worth it. Things are more challenging for us....loading a car takes an act of congress and just about as long since we have to have approval to go anywhere.. But you know, he has "Broken my heart for what breaks His" and I am his. It's NOT for everyone and GOD DOES NOT call us to do the same things at all, BUT if HE does call you to do something difficult...don't walk away! His provision is way more than you can fathom. His arms are bigger and stronger than I ever imagined and I THOUGHT they were around me in the past! They were, but as the call increased so did my vision of GOD. My eyes are so opened in ways now that I never knew were possible. I wish I could truly put it all into words like it is in my heart, but here it is in my humble attempt. Help me to share like HE wants me to and to pray for those like they need me to! Help me to say kind and encouraging words to those who need them and not to preach to them what is right for me, but what they need to hear. Help us all to hear your voice and not the muttering of Satan or the world who will try to confuse and disorient us. The world has such a strong hold on us and that makes Satan's job easy. He just lets the world spin while he watches the show. Don't let us be confused! Let me love like you love!

BREAK MY HEART FOR WHAT BREAKS YOURS...

Smooth sailing so far...

Baby K's mom is still NOT pursuing an appeal. She talks to Linda (our caseworker) all the time and is "proud" of her decision. We are thrilled not only for us, but for her. It sounds like she finally may be learning something. We have prayed for this. She has a lot of hurdles to overcome, but maybe, just maybe she is finally really thinking about what she does and the effects it has on others.

Life is going well with both babies. Caleb is really gearing up for school (been playing soccer every day in prep for the year). I am gearing up for the school year...trying to get lesson plans laid out and bookshelves in order. Colin is ready! He has been getting his stuff out to "get ahead"....hello...he is SO fun to teach!

The job thing for Locke is so frustrating. We feel like he MIGHT get an offer, but it just hasn't happened because the ""person hiring just hasn't had time to get things in order. It's his own business so he can delay. He has plenty of work.... BUT we are anxious! It has been a LONG 2010 with no job!!! We don't know if maybe he needs to really start pursuing something else....assuming there is something else...oops...there isn't. It's not like he's quit looking! I know God's timing is perfect, but we are human and have bills to pay. God has been good and we are NOT without anything in any way! Sorry to be a downer today. Lack of sleep for me will do that. Colin woke up last night with a major croup fit. After having him rushed to the hospital by ambulance when he was 3 and spending 2 nights in the hospital it's hard not to get anxious. After doing breathing treatments and getting him relaxed I just watched him breathe ALL night. Now I am tired and cranky and a tad bit negative. I should quit now. God is STILL GOOD!

How we ventured into home-schooling... the long version. Ha!

Home-schooling vs. public school vs. private school. The debate seems to swirl around everywhere I go. I am surrounded by all of the above so I know the struggles and desires and know the many prayers for the RIGHT decision that are prayed. The right decision is different for everyone. I never would have gone the home-schooling journey on my own. It just wasn't in me. Yes, I was a teacher and yes I enjoyed studying and researching and so forth, but bringing my own kids home all day. Not for me.
Then God called and set the stage... first was the strong lead to leave our church and find another one. That one was a real struggle. We weren't completely happy, but we were comfortable and lazy. Looking for new churches was agonizing. The kids cried and complained and we were worn thin, but God had called to do this. After many months of going to our old church (Locke taught a class of our friends and we had a large Care Group) at one service and rushing to another church for the other part we finally felt like we needed to be at Fellowship Bible Church. Odd that is was a church known for having loads of home-schoolers and Christian Heritage Kids. We were neither and not planning on being either. No big deal. I was very much in support of those who did home-school. I just didn't have the self discipline or energy to do it myself. Christian Heritage... well, the kids could go to college or private school and Locke, being raised in private schools is not for private school to an extent.
Well ,there we were finally feeling like we truly found a place to call home and then Caleb began to struggle more and more with his ongoing "weak stomach". It had always been a problem that had found no answers. We thought maybe he was nervous or stressed (what you are stressed about when you are under 10 is a mystery to me, but that was a theory since nothing else seemed to be wrong). It got worse and worse. We did test after test and nothing showed up. After spending the beginning of 5th grade withdrawing more and more, hanging very close to me while in public and refusing to get together with friends told me something was not working and he was falling apart as a result. When he started coming home from school crying almost daily and doubling over from constant pain it was time to do something. In Texas, school is optional.. meaning the rights to home-school are guraded and left up to the parents to choose. Upper GIs, lower GI's, abdominal this and that.... Well those were scheduled and I was tired of fighting his home room teacher about her reading program (that is another post altogether) and not being happy with the Science program either (Let me make it clear that I was VERY happy with the school the kids were in... We had differences that year, but the school is exceptional until our 2 issues in 5th grade). and finally after crying out to God to help my child... he told me what to do and it was VERY CLEAR. I began research and continued praying. After completing directing the ArtsView/Jr. League production of Alexander and the Terrible Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day to be performed for over 12,000 school aged children with home-schoolers AND adults in the cast, no doubt, I pulled him out school. No big fan fare, no big discussion, in fact, at the time only Mikki Funderburk knew it was happening (Mikki was also a sign and gift from God dropped into my lap during the show.... her son was in it and a joy to work with and she shared her journey with me). The school was FLOORED to say the least. I was a big volunteer up there so they knew me well. They tried to talk me out of it and some turned their nose up at me, but the decision was made and it was mine to make, not theirs. It was not easy, but we worked out the details as we went. I had no idea what I was doing, but I made my way and used my resources with Mikki, and CHEC and God's guidance all along. The hours of research were long. My notebook of notes was longer. I slept little and prayed more. All the meetings in CHEC were such a big help that year. They really helped me to find my way. The other mom's were incredible and quick to answer my silly questions and my big ones as well. By summer we knew Caroline would join us next. Colin would remain in PreK 2 days a week. This year they are all here and we are enjoying the rhythm that home-schooling allows. It is NOT easy, but for now IT IS GOD's PLAN and we can't go wrong when following his plan.
Caleb... well the problem didn't get better, but it was easier to deal with being at home so the level of stress resulting in the pain was better.He began to come out of his shell and return to the out-going boy he once was. A year later after the recommendation of another home-schooler (no doubt, God's confirmation.... look for the little things, HE is in them and I give him credit for this), Sylvia Ramaly, we went to yet another Specialist in Dallas who diagnosed the problem. Stomach Migraines.... no, I had never heard of such a crazy thing, but we decided to give it a shot. The meds prescribed wouldn't work if the doctor was wrong so we got them and 2 weeks later he was a different child. It was truly a miracle. Since that time he has blossomed back to the child he was before it got so bad. He is outgoing and fun and not afraid to go places. Stomach migraines are apparently fairly common, but seldom diagnosed properly. They are often thought of as IBS or various Colon problems. I wish we could help people with this! Basically what happens is the brain confuses a headache and sends the message to the stomach instead. The head doesn't hurt, but agonizing cramping much like a stomach bug accompanied by diarrhea occurs. Nothing happens, but the pain mocks the diarrhea and thus the person spends long amounts of time waiting for the inevitable that seldom comes. This happens all day long regardless of food intake. No change in diet helps, not even NOT eating does anything to make it better. We tried all of those. His food journal was long. No we just treat chronic migraines and the stomach seldom ever hurts again. Praise the LORD. IT was a long, agonizing battle for all of us. IT consumed going out in public and traveling and basically ALL the time.

Another long post, but now you know.... the rest of the story. Well, not really because there are many little stories attached to this one, but this is it for now. As far as home-schooling, we are in. I don't want to say forever OR not foever because I am listening for God's call each day, but we are pretty committed. I love knowing that our group of friends and kids have the same vision and the exposure to worldly things is minimum. Don't misunderstand... they are exposed to the things that are vital, but not the "trappings" of the world as much as we can hold them from it. They have many friends in both public schools and private, but we choose those and not the classroom they are in. Those parents are like minded with us. Even in our family we pray for wisdom in how to deal with the exposure. We all want our children to handle all kinds of people from various backgrounds, but we want them to have the maturity to make decisions that effect them and that comes in stages along the path of growth. I am not naive... remember I was in the professional entertainment industry. There is NOTHING and I do mean NOTHING I haven't seen, but I was old enough to know what to do with that information and I did fine. I chose NOT to go on to New York as a result. The life was just not for me. I do, however, have friends in it today. They are happy and yet wonder how life might have been different. I don't wonder and I don't regret. I love being just where God has called me to be.

Saturday at home!

     So Saturday has arrived and we have somewhat finished the tree and other Christmas decorations with the exception of outside. Those will wait for Caleb since he loves to be on the roof and helping. He went camping this weekend with some friends and we will wait on his return. For now I am evaluating what needs to come next. Not that I am at a loss, there is plenty to do, just nothing I want to do. We have small group from church here at our house at 6:30 so I better get moving and yet here I sit procrastinating all of it.

   I have to share a funny moment. If the content were different this would be a big moment, but this is too comical to be noteworthy of true learning on Colin's part. Okay... so here is the moment. Colin is in the bathroom and the window is fogged. He decided to use his new writing skills to express himself and share in his difficult moment. On the foggy window in his very best handwriting he writes, " Colin's bodom (bottom) is rad (red). Colin is sad." He then draws a sad face. After he completed his masterpiece he calls me. I immediately come to see what all the fuss is about. I read his note and don't know whether to laugh or congratulate him on writing 2 complete sentences on his own with periods even. It was quite a moment. I opted NOT to take a picture of the window for fear that this was more blackmail material than a mom would need. We took care of the red bottom and congratulated him on his writing and focused it on paper with a better subject. Learning comes in many forms, doesn't it?

     Colin is doing very well with school and I am so glad I didn't send him on to school. We have had a blast and he is quite a good student. He loves to sit in his $5 garage sale desk at the kitchen window and do school. He has his favorites which include Horizons Math and Explode the Code. He is almost finished with the 2nd book of Explode the Code and is in the 2nd Math book. He loves his reading book which is Pathways and is in the 2nd book already. He doesn't like the work book that goes with it, but wants to stay with the story so he does it. As a result, this is usually the last thing he does. He does several other things and has lots of books from the library, but those are his favorites. He loves reading and being read to and tries to read everything himself which can be very tiring for a mom while shopping in Walmart where there are SOOO many words!

   Next week we will do school on Monday and Tuesday to make up some time we lost. That should catch us up and actually in many areas we are ahead so that is a nice place to be. I'm sure it won't stay that way so I'll take it for now!

Letterboxing and Entepreneurial Ventures

     What a week... well I guess I should say series of weeks since it took all of them to get to the point. Yesterday was the 6th Annual Christmas Extravaganza at Kim Wallis's house. I have never actually sold anything, just helped Carolyn Shaw and Rebecca Camp put it on. It's always been fun. This year Caroline wanted to do "her" crafts, whatever that was. She loves things like this and had insisted months ago that she wanted to do some things for Christmas. Well there went hours of research for me. We had done candles before and they were not good. We used the kits from craft stores and they were drying and smelled bad. I finally found a site called Cajun Candle Factory and we were in business. We made candles in these beautiful red containers with crosses on them and the soaps were poured in a detailed cross mold and smelled delicious not to mention they were very moisturizing to the hands with the Goat's Milk soap base. Well, Caroline wanted more.... so next came the Sea Salt Scrubs. What fun! you can eat them although I don't recommend it. They really work well. We sold lots and had a great day. We may have spent all the money we earned, but all was well. Caroline counted change and packed up sacks for customers and then shopped. Partea Pizazz was her favorite venue as would be any girls!

     Now it's on to more fun stuff... weekend at grandparent's. The kids have not finished their scheduled schoolwork, but have worked hard and learned much in our quick trip to Lafayette to see Grandaddy and our craft venture. We went letterboxing and found 3 treasures in Lafayette, all of which were very educational. We go to see one of the largest Live Oak trees in the country with one branch weighing over 72 tons. It was amazing to see! We got lots of pics so I'll post soon. The St. John's Cathedral where it is located was exceptional. It was truly breathtaking along with the very old cemetery where our find was located. The tombs were all above the ground in cement casings and one was even for a soldier from the Civil War. He was from New York, but fought with the south where he felt he had to. It was pouring down rain on and off, but we traipsed through to the far side of the cemetery to find our Letterbox.